As you Like it - Beautiful

Sometimes i ask myself " Am i liking it ?"
But i have to confess i have no choice. Even if i had the luxury i am not sure i would have favored something better for it isn't just good but positively copacetic. May be the reason why I am yet to find the firmness to elude the perplexity that surrounds me.

I have been accustomed to speak out my heart in every circumstance and i wish i could when it comes to this but i am not sure as to what would be congruous whether to speak out or to be passive for in either case the ball would be in my court at the end of the day.

Many a times i feel i should make the initiative but for the fear of ridiculing myself if it happened to be delusive. What makes it more eerie is the fact that i am aware that it knows that i know of its affinity and my despondence. If i choose to let things happen and i decide to wait and watch i have to admit that with every passing moment i tend to contradict my own precept.

I know the end at the beginning but i yearn to change the end before i come to it.But if i prefer my own beatitude i would end up excruciating my kindred.I am taking a stance that is betwixt and between both ends for which i have none to blame but me. I do not wish to build castles in the air nor do i wish to deprive myself of the happiness or mirth that i deserve.

I have decided to take things as it comes and not to ponder over futurity. I want this to be a memory which i would look back and rejoice rather than to regret. As i write this i am clear that things are better this way and i do not intend to complicate issues.
I ask myself " why is that i have the freedom to choose everything but not the one that would give me everything" Sometimes i ask myself " Am i liking it ?" And i have to say I am loving it.